I'm having a baby...no really, a baby!

It occurred to me the other day that I'm having a baby.
I mean, I get it. She's in there. Moving around, having dance parties at 11pm, stretching my tummy out and making me really cranky if I haven't eaten in a few hours.
But really...a baby!
I was sitting and doing the math again the other day as I have my doc appt tomorrow and I thought to myself...
"Holy F*@$&! We have 3 months to go!"
Three months people! That is not a long time...AT ALL.
I have fully embraced pregnancy. You kind of have to. I appreciate my growing belly (for the most part) and as I have said before I got really lucky. It (pregnancy) seems to suit me. Not that I am planning to do this again terribly soon, I'm just sayin'.
But all of a sudden as I am mere moments from my third trimester, things are changing. I am getting more and more uncomfortable, sleeping less, heartburn is killing me, I suspect that my feet may swell soon and I have discovered one baby stripe (I will not say stretch mark) right across the middle of my upper belly.
I have also started to think about what is to come after Dec. 10th (my supposed due date). I won't be working right away, my hubby will be working all the time, and I will be left alone with this little person who will be relying on me for survival...no pressure.
I'm a little scared. Scratch that, I'm a lot scared! I know I have an incredible support system and plenty of people waiting in the wings to jump out and babysit, visit, cook dinner, or just hold her while I nap.
But still...
I'M the one who has to give birth. I'M the one who has to figure out breastfeeding. There will be days when it is just her and I, trying to figure each other out, for hours on end.
Don't get me wrong. I am very much looking forward to my alone time with my little girl but let's be real...it's probably gonna get old for a bit before she starts reacting and developing her personality.
So here I sit. Scared, excited, fat(in a good, purposeful way...but fat), scared, emotional, thrilled, oh and scared.
I can't wait to meet her and start this whole new chapter.
But I also kind of dig things the way they are...before the whole childbirth thing happens.
I have so many plans for our family.
But I feel completely unprepared for her arrival.
I'm so excited to carry her and hug her and help her take her first steps.
But I think I will miss feeling her inside of me.


It is a massive bag of mixed emotions as we move closer to the end of the first leg of this incredible journey.

Maternity clothing. Necessary evil? Or big, fat(hehe) waste of money?

That is my question today folks. I know my vote.
Big, fat (pun absolutely intended) waste of money.
Does this mean I will not purchase maternity clothes? That I believe myself to be as big as I will get during this pregnancy? That I will miraculously return to my former figure immediately after giving birth? That I will choose to not have more children, rendering my purchased maternity clothing useless after 6 months-ish of wear?
Nope.
I just don't feel the need to rush out and buy a bunch of expensive clothing that I may or may not use again. I will admit that I have gotten lucky in the timing of all of this. The majority of my pregnancy has been spent in the summertime which means flowy dresses and tank tops. I also have a job that requires me to wear comfortable, stretchy clothing. I have purchased a couple of pairs of leggings for $5 a pop at Target to try and get me through the fall, as well as a "tummy sleeve".
I also got lucky in the sense that I lost some weight right before I found out I was pregnant and at 6 months I finally have my beloved baby bump.
Yes, I am aware that I will get bigger, much bigger as my little sea monkey continues to grow and yes, my pants in general are having a really hard time closing, if at all, these days. But dammit, I will hold out. I will wear my leggings and sweaters, dresses and tights, stretchy pants and tummy sleeve as long as I can!
Unless of course I find a really cute, button down, belted maternity top in a fabulous fall color. Then all bets are off.

Pregnancy is going well....thanks!

It is a gross and rainy day here in MD. Ty has a meeting for most of the afternoon and I will probably spend most of the day cleaning and cooking(I am planning spaghetti squash with eggplant and an arugula caprese salad..mmm...)
Anyways. I've been thinking a lot lately about all the things I am SO excited to do with our baby girl. So, with that in mind, here is a list of things that I cannot wait to do with my daughter in the next few years.
Renaissance Festival-I love the RenFest! I don't dress up (but I also don't mind the people who choose to). I love everything about it. I love the music, the performances, being outdoors, the food, the atmosphere. We look forward to it every year. This year I will be nice and preggo for it (mmmm the food) but next year Baby Girl Cobb will be just the right age to start hanging with us! I can picture her strapped to Ty with one of our carriers, Ty holding a beer or a turkey leg and Baby Girl getting her first taste of ice cream! Yay!
D.C. Museums- I have only been to D.C. twice since moving so close. Once for a lovely night out with a friend in Georgetown and then for the weekend for a cancer walk in memory of my mother in law. Both times we had other things happening and were not able to hit up the museums. I would like to do this with my kid. I may possibly wait until she is a little bit older but I most definitely want to do this.
Christmas-sy stuff- I can't wait to take her to see trees and lights and maybe even Santa. She's going to be a little too young this year but in the next couple of years this will be fun!
Chicago- This needs to be soon...only because I can't imagine not pushing a stroller around our old neighborhood. Show her all the places we love there and show her where mommy and daddy met.
Grandma and Grandpa's Pool- My folks have a pool back in Mn and I cannot wait til she's old enough and I can take her there to swim and hang with the fam!
Family Reunions- I can't wait to show her off! My family never did "reunions" while I was growing up because we were always around each other anyway but Ty's family has them every year practically. Next summer we'll be heading to Vermont for one that I'm so excited about.
Just going out and about- I have always vowed to be the kind of parent who shared experiences with my child, not let my child keep me from the experiences. I can't wait to walk around downtown Annapolis, hit up the shrimp feast/oyster roast in North Beach, road trip down to Asheville (so Mommy can go to the breweries this time!), playdates (hint, hint, Karice, Tiffany, Janelle), shopping, wine tasting (I said it!), the Minnesota State Fair, whatever!
Obviously there are a lot of things I can list here. Those are just a few off the top of my head. I get so excited when I think about all the things I get to do with her and how lucky we are!

Part 6-Maybe we should start saying the homestretch.

I had my 22 week appointment today. Last night I grabbed my calendar to do some math and yes, I am in fact, entering my 6th month. Holy shit!
Appointment went well. Last time I saw this very sweet, very green physician's assistant who had nothing but concern for everything! She was very kind but she was concerned about my weight, my bowels, what I eat, what I drink and when I travel. It was a little much.
Today I saw my first male dr. I dug him. He was laid back and addressed all my concerns pretty thoroughly. We got to hear Baby Girl again, I found out where my uterus is now located (it's everywhere!) and he debunked a couple of minor concerns I had which helped me relax and enjoy my coffee (among other things).
So all is well. Baby Girl Cobb is growing as she should and even while running the Doppler over my belly to hear her heart, the doc mentioned what a mover and shaker she is! At this point there is no concern over MY weight since she is growing just fine and next time around I get to go in for my glucose test...yay!
Speaking of food....hehehe...I thought I would chat about some of the food that I have learned to love/become obsessed with/can't get enough of while I grow this child inside of me.
Obviously I try and eat as healthy as possible while taking in the right amount of calories.
Actually, that's a lie(not the healthy part). I haven't paid attention to calorie intake at all. I eat when I am hungry, stop when I am full and make sure to get snacks in every few hours.
But I have noticed that I have a bit more of a sweet tooth than normal.
Here are some of the ways I absolutely succumb to my sweet tooth.
+Blueberry waffles-I have always loved them and even more so now!
+Ice cream-Yep, as cliche as it sounds I do love me a nice bowl of the cold stuff at the end of the day. Chocolaty, fruity, whatever, doesn't matter.
+This one I got from a friend-Take one of those small pre-made graham cracker crusts, fill it with fruit, whipped cream and hot fudge to top it off. Mmmmm. Hey, there's fruit!
+And my fave. I buy cheap packages of medium size, soft chocolate chip cookies ($1 for 8!) and heat them for 20 seconds in the microwave. They come out all gooey and warm. I eat one with a huge glass of milk. Sometimes I top it with a little peanut butter. I never go a day without a milk and cookie break!
+Sweet potatoes-Nothing new there, they rock!
Other than that I try and eat spinach every day(I LOVE spinach, really!)and I drink water constantly.
But nothing else really stands out as being strange or abnormal.
I do miss rare steak, red wine and sushi. These are the biggies that I have avoided for the most part during this time. I have avoided others but they're not worth mentioning.
I know it will all be worth it though when our little girly gets here so I will suck it up with my water, overdone steak and cookies!

Part 5-Yep! Still pregnant.

As discussed a few times in this blog, I was born with a congenital bone disease called Fibrous Dysplaysia.
Say WHAT?
Long story short, my left tibia did not grow as fast as the rest of me and was left smaller and weaker. I broke my ankle twice and had numerous operations to try and "fix" my leg. The only one that worked was done when I was 13 years old. I had my leg lengthened (got 3 1/2 inches!) and through that process my ankle was able to heal, I was able to walk better and I continue to thrive as a walker/dancer/all around grown woman with a brace.
Needless to say, whenever I fill out a "medical history" form I give the short version and if the doc has any other questions, so be it.
So, that time that I got pregnant, obviously the doc had some questions although not as many as I thought considering that my tibia isn't terribly close to my uterus.
Now. I have ALWAYS known that this "disease" is not genetic. It is a fluke, one in a million shot and I got lucky.
Yeah, yeah, yeah I am me, not my leg and everything I went through made me the strong person I am today blah, blah, blah. Hey, I've worn a brace on my leg since I was 6 years old. I basically learned to walk on crutches. I've never really known any different so I don't worry too much about it. So there.
ANYHOO. As I was leaving the doctor after my first visit to establish that there was in fact a little bun in my oven, I was still high on the sounds of heartbeat when the doc stopped me. "I think you should see the high risk doctor for your 20 wk ultrasound."
Say WHAT?
This can stress a woman out for many reasons. What is wrong with me that I need to see the high risk guy? What is wrong with my baby? Does this mean I can't have preggo sex? Does this mean you think I am over 35??!?!?!!
Of course it all came down to the leg. I explained to her that it is not genetic but if my insurance covered it, whatever.
Fast forward to the ultrasound. We see all the stuff we're supposed to, they write down the sex of our unborn child and put it in an envelope as we requested and send the big doc in to chat about all the stuff they saw and we didn't understand. According to him, everything looks great, no need for concern anywhere and hey, what's this thing about your leg?
I go through the whole story explaining, in a nutshell, my life ages 3-14. He listens some what distractedly while running the transducer over my belly. "So here is an arm," he shows us. "And here is the left leg, and this right here is the left tibia."
I have seen x-rays of my left tibia so many times in my life that I could easily pick mine out of a line up of hundreds. I am am also aware of what a weak bone looks like on an x-ray. I am also aware of the fact that my baby's bones are not completely formed or hardened yet.
But that left tibia was so straight and bright white that I got a little misty in the office that day.
Yes, I knew that there was a slim to none chance that she would have this disease and frankly, mine wasn't discovered or diagnosed until I was 3 years old and walking. But something about that lovely doctor going out of his way to find her left tibia and show it to me made my heart swell.
Now if only I could try and guarantee a massively high i.q. and a love of showtunes, I'd be set!

Part 4-We need a new title, huh?

So when you get yourself knocked up, with the help of some wonderful man, you want to get every book you see on the matter! Now, I have always been a reader. And I have always been a fan of the library. I would like to feed my child someday so I thought instead of buying every book I could that I would A. hit up my pals who recently had kids and B. go to the library, then if I really liked the book I could go out and buy it.
Here are some of the books that I have read/perused/live my newly pregnant life by:
What To Expect While Your Expecting-This NEVER leaves my bedside.
The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy-Smeh, it was alright but she is very opinionated and the only person I want having opinions about my pregnancy is me.
Belly Laughs-Jenny McCarthy. She's hot. She's funny. It was amusing but a writer she is not.

Now, every one of these books will list for you all of the crazy ass things that will happen to your body, face and mind throughout this process and they always like to preface that some may or may not happen to you personally. I would now like to talk about some of those crazy ass things and how they have affected me.
Trimester One: Nausea, exhaustion and the sorest boobs in America...seriously, my husband couldn't even look at them! That's what I had. Some women get super nasal ability which can either help them detect drugs in a crowded bus station or just make them want to puke all the time. I really wanted this super power, it sounded fun.
Trimester Two: Here's where the fun started for me. Yes I got more energy and my boobs stopped hurting but I also got tummy cramps, crazy hungry, itchy belly, tummy cramps and I now pee whenever I sneeze. I also have a pretty short torso so all my innards are shoved up near my esophagus which makes it relatively uncomfortable to cough.
And yes, I pee ALL THE TIME.
My prenatal vitamins have made my fingernails amazing but really haven't done a whole lot for my hair yet. And P.S. they're gummy!
I have yet to have anything weird happen to my face but my veins, particularly in the area of the decollatage, look like something from a sci-fi movie!
Now for the mind. I am pretty much convinced that it has nothing to do with the obscene amount of hormones that are coursing through my body and more about the fact that I have SO MUCH SHIT TO THINK ABOUT! I am moody, forgetful, and all of a sudden very clumsy.
I'm gassy but of course, I always have been.
And now the saddest of all(besides the fact that my libido is nowhere near it's normal state but that is an entirely different blog), slowly but surely my belly button is disappearing. Yep, I have a feeling that I will in fact, "poke out".
I think I've covered quite enough and I know I will have more to add once we move into Trimester Three.
As for now I will finish with a picture of me at 20 weeks (actually showing a little bit). I plan to continue to document the belly as my little one (and I) grow.

Part 3-How is your pregnancy going? Are we sick of this yet?

So here we are. According to the docs calculations, today we are officially at 20 weeks, or halfway there, or "Holy crap we haven't done any of the shit we should have done. We need to get the nursery ready and find a place for all those goddamn books"!
I'm only half joking. This really is a special day and we spent it doing a couple of special pregnancy related things. I bought my first piece of maternity wear (a "tummy sleeve", to help me continue to wear my pre preg pants) and we decided to actually start documenting my belly as I am finally starting to show a little. What does this process entail? Well really it's about me trying to find an ok outfit, good lighting, the perfect pose and then still hating every shot while my husband stands ever patient with the camera phone.
And there's the point of today's blog. My husband. And his patience.
Now normally he doesn't have an amazing amount of it but as he stands by his hormonal, emotional, neurotic wife, he is a pillar of patience (for the most part). So here a list of some of the amazingly nice things my husband has done(and will continue to do?) for me as we continue on this journey.
1-He rubs my foot (my right foot, if you really know me you understand this). My wonderful husband has to be one of the worst foot rubbers...ever. He just doesn't have the patience and/or concentration. But since getting me pregnant he has really stepped up, pun intended. He goes above and beyond with lotions and such and does it without even having to be asked.
2-He finally tells me what I want to hear...to a point. I get it, I'm preggers, I'm gonna get big. And I WANT to. But there are days that you look in the mirror and see all the weird changes that are happening and you get upset. That's where the good man comes in. My baby tells me how beautiful I am and supports me no matter how many outfit changes I go through, I mean come on, it's not like he's not used to it!
3-Little things.....like telling me it's ok to stay in while he walks the dog. Finding me a walking stick since our neighborhood is full of hills and hills aren't fun right now AND if I happen to forget said walking stick he will put one hand on the small of my back and gently guide me up those hills. And going shopping with me, which he usually hates, to pick out our first little present for our baby girl.
He has been patient, caring, funny, supportive, honest and loving. All the things that are gonna make him a great dad.